Freak of the Week: February 8 – 14, 2009

Posted in The Winner Is with tags on February 10, 2009 by Pure Evyl

dominatrixsnappingwhip1

Congratulations go this week to Anonymum. This week with a crack of the wit and a crack of the whip, she captured the illustrious title of Freak of the Week. Now on to the ode.

For Anonymum

From the Land Down Under

She makes us all wonder

Just what the fuck will next she say

Whatever it is, it will be done just her way.

Will it be sweet or will it be witty?

Will she play nice or give someone the  shitty?

Whatever it is it will be spot on for sure

That is her charm and that’s her allure.

Advertisements

Freak Of The Week: February 1 – 7,2009

Posted in The Winner Is with tags on February 3, 2009 by Pure Evyl

logo_grit_big

Once again the Grit has pulled it off. With his usual style and flair, he has captured the title of Freak of the Week. Congrats Grit!!! You are truly one of a kind and we are all thankful for that. Enough of the bs on to the ode.

For The Grit

Hello, world, hear the song that Grit’s singin’
C’mon get freaky!
A whole lot of freakin’ is what Grit’s  bringin’
He’ll make you freaky!

Grit had a dream, he’d go travelin’ in an old pick-up truck,
He’d spread a little freakin’ then he’d keep movin’ on.
If he can’t find a little freakin’ of what we’re a speakin’ It don’t matter  Because, He gets a happy feelin’ when he’s pullin’ his dong.

Trav’lin’ along there’s a song that Grit’s singin’
C’mon get freaky!
A Whole lot of freakin’ is what Grit’s bringin’
He’ll make you freaky!
He’ll make you freaky!
He’ll make you freaky!

Congrats Grit!!!

Freak of The Week – January 25 – 31, 2009

Posted in The Winner Is with tags on January 27, 2009 by Pure Evyl

coffee_girl

This week finds the lovely and talented JavaQueen as the reigning winner and Freak of the Week. With a swift and bitingly witty advertising slogan for a new dating site she wins the admiration of the Freak Finding Panel of Judges. Now on with my ode.

For JavaQueen:

Straight from the heart and straight from the hip.

You don’t take no shit and you don’t take no lip.

I like it the most when you pull of the gloves

I even can ahh on your posts of puppy love.

Freak Of The Week: January 18 – 24, 2009

Posted in The Winner Is with tags on January 20, 2009 by Pure Evyl

Long has he laboured and many were the defeats but finally at long last Michael has proved his freakish worth and captioned the winning entries. Congratulations Michael and no other ode would do than resurrecting a Fuck You Haiku in your honor.

For Michael

Mr. Sensitive

Has all the ladies swooning.

It’s Smoke and Mirrors.

motorboatin

Freak Of The Week: January 11 – 18, 2009

Posted in The Winner Is with tags on January 13, 2009 by Pure Evyl

Save The DanceTeam Captain. Save The World!!!

Save The DanceTeam Captain. Save The World!!!

This weeks winner was able to fuck up a meme with style and grace. MJ from Note to Self is the deserving Freak of the Week. Congrats MJ and here is a little token of my esteem.

For MJ

It was back in June when you caught my eye

Posting of an event that’s need none could deny.

I’ve heard it said that One should never suffer a fool gladly

But this event, I looked forward to quite madly.

The first of July will always hold my attention at sway

For from you I learned that this date is Slap a Moron Day.

Since then I have learned that from small packages come great things.

And cleavage shall always be king!!!

(Actually it probably should be queen but that don’t rhyme.)

Congrat’s MJ, you are truly a Freak among freaks and one of the best bloggers on the web and a damn fine person. Your man in blue is indeed a very lucky man.

And for anyone that has never visited MJ, go and give Note to Self a read. And go and read her archives from June and July of 2008 to check out her posts on Slap a Moron Day. It is some of the funniest stuff that I have ever seen.

Freak Of The Week: December 21, 2008 – January 3, 2009

Posted in The Winner Is with tags on December 23, 2008 by Pure Evyl

vallejo-vampires-kiss

It seems almost fitting that the last Freak of the Week should go to my long suffering wife. It must be tough to be married to a twisted individual such as myself. It helps that she is pretty damned twisted herself. So on to my ode to my not so blushing bride.

For Mrs. Evyl

As I look on my work with a keen sense of mirth

I call you to gaze on what I have unleashed on the earth.

I see you gaze on the pics and stories standing so near

And look upon your face and I see your sneer.

And I know that I have hit the mark by chance or by luck

When I hear you exclaim, ‘You sick twisted fuck.’

Thanks for putting up with a freak.

And thanks for being my freak for 759 weeks.

Freak Of The Week: December 14 – 20, 2008

Posted in The Winner Is with tags on December 16, 2008 by Pure Evyl

Wayne John with style and flair captured the coveted Freak of the Week title with this explanation of the perfect gift to give Santa to ensure maximum presents.

A bondage horse, a full array of dildos, oils and lubes, 9 fine maidens, 8 filthy whores, 7 slutty tramps, 6 bitches boinking, 5 Golden Rains! 4 titties touching, 3 french hens, 2 aspirin, and a penis in case his don’t work.

Santa just has to be pleased with that. Now on to my ode to the Freak.

For Wayne John

An anti-social social network guru

Try humming that three times fast on a kazoo.

His avatars a green goggled cat.

I wonder if he has made it into a homemade tat

But where would you put a tat like that.

I would not put it on a shaven head

A dog might get pissed and chew it dead.

Perhaps he could put it on his wang

Perhaps that would be just the thang.

That might be like a pleasant dream

To have your cat lick up some cream.

Congrats Wayne John and as the Duke said, “If you’ve got them by the balls their hearts and minds will follow.” And your entry really had it by the balls.